Friends are the glue to mend a broken heart (:

Helen's right, i'm not changing; but just showing a different part of me (:

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I 'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you
I know you were right believing for so long
I 'm all out of love, what am I without you
I can't be too late to say that I was so wrong.

I didn't think so, but I do. And now you're gone, so what can I do?

If today was my last day, I'd regret so much stuff. I don't live my life to the fullest. Nowhere near. I get too scared of what may happened. Why? I don't know. What should I do? Just give up and ignore the situation like I usually do? Or, do what will make me happier? Both has it's own consequences. One will bring me a slight depression for who knows how long. The other, it's a loose canon. I don't know what can come out of it. Ha ha, coin flipping time?

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Why do I feel like punching someone in the face? What's wrong with me. It's frustrating because I don't even know. Why can't I talk to anyone about it? People easily trust me, why can't I do the same? I don't like myself.

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I did not hit good today at Newark. There's too much on my mind, and i'm getting headaches from it. Whatever. I'm tired.

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Smile for the stars, cause you don't know who's watching.

Lmaoo.. Cynthia M. and I made a deal. We have to each be in a relationship this year so it can be "more enjoyable". She's making me get a girlfriend either before she gets a boyfriend or within a month after. LOL. This will be interesting (: She's going to be sooo mad at me for breaking this deal. She's such a funny bunny. I wanna see how life will treat me this year.

Unneccessary drama deserves a slap in the face.

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._.

2 1/2 weeks in of school. I'm getting back to what I used to be, bored of life. When I get bored from it, i start to slowly separate myself from the world. Why? Who knows. I'm getting tired of it. Of everything. We'll see what will happen. Even if I talk a lot, I don't feel like it much anymore. Why? Who knows. I'll write more laters. I'm getting bored.

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): i'm sleepy, but I can't sleep. >< Only had 2 hours of sleep last night due to procasinating on IDs :x

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Getting back to old habits. Procasinating so much, failing so much. I thought I had changed, but it looks like it's coming back to bite me in the ass. So much homework. Must finish. Then, must get ahead. Talk to you later world.

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Procasination is my key to success ^^;

Soo, I've completely finished 7 ID's, 14 more analysis to go. =] But first, procrastination!

Lately, it's been CRAZY. Soo much homework. Sooo much socializing. >_> Why when one increased, so did the other?! It's not suppose to be like that =[ Sigh, only two more years. The first two years I thought it dragged on forever, but when the second half started I feel like there's sooo much little time left, and so much to do! I haven't lived life to the fullest, and i'm ashamed of myself for it =/ Life, slow down please :[ I'm still scared of my AP classes. AP history isn't to bad, just time consuming. However, i'm scared of physics and english.

TENNIS. [: I hope I can snowboard this winter. But of course, school comes first.

@Helen
Just bring a parachute (: Jkay. If it happens, it'll be ineivatble, but let's both try our best not to let it happen, yes? (: I only have 2 years left of High School, and we better be the best of friends 'till the end!

&& don't be sad please :[
I hate it what your family has done to you. You hide it so well though X_X. So happy all the time. If I lived your life, i'd probably have quit a long time ago. Plese don't though =/. After High School, then you're free. If I could, I would have taken you away from them but realistic, that's impossible. However, I'll never stop being your friend so you can always turn to me.

Weeeeee, hair grows (: Pssh, just look in one of those handheld mirrors and you'll just see the same pretty face :D

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Please don't take my sunshine away, I don't want to live in the dark.

So much homework. I thought it'd distract me from the rest of the world, but it turns out the rest of the world is distracting me from it. However, it's gotten a lot more fun this year than the past two years (: It's partly due to the fact that I some really awesome new freshmen friends like Lily, Cynthia, and Helen, and also i've gotten closer to some of my friends that I had since Jr. High. It's also due to the fact that i've changed a lot over the summer:
I've learn to appreciate my friend's presence after not seeing them for heckalong months. I've learn that stress only brings on more stress, and i don't like to work with stress. I've learn to be more open about this and just be myself, mainly thanks to helen, cynthia, stella, margaret, and all of my senior friends because I can express my inner dokrness (: I've learn that if i procasinate, I don't get anythng done. I've learn that true happiness can be achive. I've learn the meaning of hardwork. I've learn that I take a lot of things for granted, and i'm real bitchy at times and i got to stop. I've learn to appreciate the world around me and the things I have. I've learn that I have to except myself for who I am, and not who i'm not. I've learn that if really want it, I have to get it myself, because who else would get it for me? I feel dfferent taking on Junior year, and it's a good thing because it's going to be a hellish ride. Bring it on school year number 11.

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